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11.6.20: From the so-called desk of…

…Helen.

Jump Back and Fall Forward

Well here we are again; after being dazed and confused for days, we finally turned our clocks back an hour. And while the age old adage of spring forward and fall back is somewhat helpful, those simple 60 minutes always seems to throw everyone off kilter. But once again we fell in line and turned our clocks back with the dangling carrot promise of an extra hour of sleep. But who are we kidding? I doubt that extra hour has ever left anyone feeling more rested, and I don’t know about anyone else, but I usually spend the next 2 days calculating what time it was before I set my clocks back an hour, or forward.

And why on earth do they always sneak it in at 2am when most people are still asleep? Are they hoping no one will notice? I personally think we would be much more appreciative if the time change came as a complete surprise. Just imagine how awesome it would be to wake up to a surprise text letting you know you can go back to sleep for another hour. That way we could bypass all of the anticipation and angst.

But then there’s the whole spring forward nonsense, which is never a cause for celebration. In fact it is so heinous that it is not unusual for people to bitch and groan for an entire week. While the whole surprise thing might work for the fall back scenario, the last thing anyone needs is a surprise text or an early morning wake-up call. I can almost hear the deafening sound of everyone throwing their alarms and cell phones across the room.

I did however read somewhere that in order to avoid the entire one hour shock treatment, it may be easier on us if we woke up 12 minutes earlier every day over a 5-day period. At first I thought I could live with that, until I realized I would have to change all my clocks five days in a row. Good heavens, in my house there’s the microwave clock, the oven clock, the toaster oven clock, my alarm clock, our grandfather clock, the cuckoo clock, four old-school wrist watches, and last but not least, my classic black cat wall clock with the swinging tail and rolling eyes. Interestingly enough, the only things that I don’t have to reset are my cell phone, laptop, and my older-than-dirt Time Warner cable box. And inevitably, and just when I think I’ve changed all my clocks, the second I get in my car I remember there is still one more clock. And by the way, if your car can remind you to change your oil, inflate your tires, tell you exactly where you are, then why on earth haven’t they figured out how to auto adjust my car clock… just saying.

So right about now we should all be asking, why do we continue this charade? It is no longer relevant and totally throws off everyone’s circadian rhythm. While for obvious reasons the coffee lobby continues to support time change, both Arizona and Hawaii are doing perfectly fine without it. So can we all agree to come together, stop all  this nonsense, and agree to spring ahead to 2021 or beyond? Do I hear a “Hell yes?”

This says it all!